1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
