ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
