You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
