question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
