these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize
