I hate all girls vehemently.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
