There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
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