We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
