Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize