i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
