she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
