I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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