maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
