she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Randomize
