this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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