you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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