he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
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