john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
