He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Randomize
