Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Randomize
