hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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