the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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