Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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