He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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