I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
