Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Randomize
