Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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