im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Randomize
