Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Randomize
