We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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