I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
