You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Randomize
