In the future we'll all be gay
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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