There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Randomize
