awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Randomize