There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize
