she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
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