there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Randomize
