Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Randomize
