Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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