I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
She announced her abortion via fbk
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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