we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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