Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
