I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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