Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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