I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
