Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Randomize
