It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
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