I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
