Don't you send me to vm
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Ladies don't puke and tell
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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