I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
